It was the end, yet also a beginning...

For quite some time I’ve been playing with the idea to start a blog. And, as many things, I’ve of course started overthinking it from all angles!

Firstly, if it’s my first blog, what will I say? How do I ensure it is spectacular? That I say what needs to be said? When do I post it? The pressure, man!

So, how does one approach this without going mad!? Well, the madness is too late for me, but maybe my process can help you! 😉

When I thought about when I would want it published, my thoughts first went to like, as soon as possible. But the symbolic, significance seeking and sentimental me just couldn’t let this be insignificant…

I decided on the 13th of August, for oh so many reasons, and reasons you will learn of as you get to know me better. But the main reason of this date’s significance for right now is, it is the date that I reached out for help when I was done with life in it’s whole. A date that got me to try just one more time. My thought “if there’s help, I’ll try, if not, then so be it…”

I cannot call this period of my life my breakdown, my meltdown, or even (like Brené Brown) a spiritual awakening. It was the end, yet also a beginning. Yet words cannot describe that time, those moments, the darkness, hurt and complete hopelessness, emptiness and nothingness that consumed me. I realised that I was further down than rock bottom, beyond the realms of what some may call hell. It felt like my flesh was ripped open, my insides exposed for all to see and no tourniquet big enough to help me.

With that vivid image, if you’re still reading, niiiice! 😊

So now you get my date, I took a leap and asked for help. My personal journey in mental health recovery started.

I mean, I’m a social worker, mental health is what I eat, sleep and play. I should know it inside out, right!? Well, no. I of course now found my oomf, my niche, the thing that gets me excited and up in the morning, but in a time, it was only theory to me. Things I see and then distance myself. The reality just never struck. And man, when it did hit me, it got me good!!

In my posts I would like to share my stories and my journey with you. The ups and down, the good, bad and oh so damn ugly. I have this thought in my mind (for years to be honest) that I’d like to write a book. A memoire. I want to tell my story! And with this blog, I hope it is the start thereof. I hope it can spark hope. Joy when I share my joy. But in it all, that you can know you are not in this alone. Yeah, I need that therapist line of course. But get this, not only am I a mental health professional, I am also a professional mental healthy person in recovery thereof.

I’d like to share my tips, traits and inspirations. The things I try when that shadow creeps in. How I get out of bed when everything inside me wants to just stay there forever. The little celebrations, the hope I have, for myself, but also for others.

Join me in MY story of recovery. Living with Depression and Anxiety. Battling, fighting, surviving, but mostly, this is my story of perseverance. Welcome 😊

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